Thursday, May 19, 2016

Swimsuit Shopping: A Compromise

How about a post in which I do something other than bitch whine complain bemoan being too busy to post? I wasn't sure I could get a post out this week, but a little successful swimsuit shopping experience inspired a post.  

Successful swimsuit shopping? A bit of an oxymoron, isn't it? 

Target dressing room pic of the top. Workout pants and shoes are not part of the swimsuit. 
Who here loves swimsuit shopping? Me? No. There was one summer, a long long time ago, when I honestly enjoyed it and I bought something like seven suits in one season. Those years are gone and I've sported the same ruched-sided red Miracle Suit for the past two years only after I reluctantly threw out the very worn ruched-sided black Miracle Suit. 

With my kids getting a little bit older and thinking we may start spending more time at the pool, I wanted to try to get something new. I've been working out a bit and wanted to try something outside of the slimming ruched sided one piece. It's still kind of scary going into the dressing room because I'm not quite there. I'm feeling pretty good, but those dressing room lights and three way mirrors can be unforgiving. 

But let's start with the bottoms. I hate shopping for swim suit bottoms. They always cut in just the wrong spot and make a particular area poof out. If that problem sounds familiar to you, I have to suggest getting on board with the scallop trend that's going around.  They don't pinch and cut in, but seem to lay against the body in a more flattering way. Although there are various versions around, this bargain pair from Old Navy look just as good.  They're made of a nice thick textured material and seem to cover everything that they should be covering. 

The matching top, on the other hand, was a different story (at least for me). It looked cute on in the dressing room, so long as I stood still and didn't try to move my arms. Being that I knew that the chances of me picking up a squirming preschooler are high, I knew that wasn't going to work. Mind you, I'm not that endowed, but I was too big for this top and revealing things that shouldn't be revealed. 

So, I left the store with bottoms only, certain that I could find a more suitable top. 

At first, I picked up this floral scalloped top from Nordstrom because....scallops. 

You're going to have to deal with the flat lay. I'm just not ready for modeling two piece swim suits yet. 
Okay, so I like it. The Nordstorm top definitely has more support and coverage than the Old Navy top and I like the floral print. I ordered it online and haven't returned it ...... yet.  I'm just.....I don't know if I can actually wear this. It just reveals so much. I'm just showing so much skin. Can I really wear this to a public pool or....even scarier....a pool party with friends and acquaintances?  That's hard. I mean, posting pictures of myself in a cheap target bikini on a public blog and then posting a link to that blog post on my Facebook page is one thing. (I still can't believe I did that).  Actually wearing it to the pool is another.  

Without returning it, I kept looking. Although I was trying to avoid the tankini (because, like most bottoms, they always just seem to cut off and in at the most unflattering parts on me), I spotted this "flyaway" tankini at Target.  

This is the mother of all swim suit tops. 

The bottom half of the top is sheer and flowy and has a big slit in the front that stays closed.  

I felt good in this. Not good in the sense that I was trying to cover and hide and squeeze something in, but that I'm just giving a little hint of what's underneath which....might still be a little fleshy (especially after last week's vacation) but getting there....getting there.  

I seriously love this top. I think it is so flattering and pretty and flowy. I'm actually now on the hunt for a black maxi skirt--something fitted with a high slit on the side.  I think it would make a great pool party cover up.  

If you're like me and you're wanting to break a bit into the land of the two piece but just not quite ready to go full on bare bellied, go to Target and try these on. They come in so many prints and solids too.  There's some more expensive versions and Miracle Suit has a version as well. But, honestly, I love the Target version.  It does come with a detachable strap.  

So there I have it. I have my new flattering two piece for the summer. It's all about compromise.  

Have you found your swimsuit this season yet? 

Saturday, May 7, 2016

Oh, Hey There

I've been a bad blogger (again) and haven't posted anything recently. But I got my hair done yesterday and I had to show off the one salon bathroom pic I got before heading outside into a rain storm. I hate it when that happens after I have a good blowout. If you can't tell, I'm growing my hair out and it's slowly getting there. If you heard shouts of joy, that would be my husband when I told him. is happening. We've hit some challenges recently with my kiddos, and especially my son, waking up really really early and staying up really really late and not napping on the weekend and that's been eating into my usual blogging time. Work has been busy, but in a good way. Plus, we're getting ready for a month full of travel, for both family and work. So, although I had hoped to pick up the blogging schedule again, it's just not happening. But I'm not giving up.

It might not be this month, but I am not giving up. Due to travel, I may not be leaving comments on your blogs, but I'm probably trying to read them on the fly and on my phone.

I have a lot to talk about and I miss you all. I tried some new products during the Sephora VIB sale. I haven't been shopping too much, but have picked up a couple of things here and there that I like. I want to give my updated thoughts on Beachbody coaching and how I've tweaked the 21 Day Fix eating plan with success (I recently had my body fat tested at 18.8%!--I kind of don't trust it, but I kind of don't want to question it). Speaking of the kiddos, I want to talk about how I've registered my son for kindergarten and how I've signed both of them up for some team sports and dance lessons. I want to talk about some new career goals (that other career I have) and some books I've read and listened to. I've found some new YouTubers and Snapchatters and Podcasts to follow as well as shows to watch. I've got so much to say and no time to type and snap a good picture to go with the post. Life is getting in the way.

It may or may not be this month. I'm thinking it's not going to be this week. But I'm going to be back. I miss you all.

Monday, April 25, 2016

Two....Just Two

I have two kids. I also just turned 43. So, I guess this means I'll only have two kids.

When you have one kid, people always ask when you'll have another. When you have two kids, people ask you if you want to have another. When you have two kids and you're in your 40s, people don't ask. 

I had friends who, after two and sometimes after one baby, knew for certain that they were done. They just were. There was no question. Me? I never had that feeling. Although I did get rid of a lot of baby stuff during a garage sale, for some reason I held on to my maternity clothes, one box of baby girl onesies and basics and my favorite baby sling. They didn't take up much room and I really believed that getting rid of those was a sure fire way to find myself preggers again. 

But one of the downsides of starting a family in your late 30s is that there really isn't time to grow your family beyond a table of four. I knew I was lucky for what I had and I wasn't feeling too much of a sense of loss. But I just had that feeling...

So last summer, while I was still a young 42, we made the decision to give it one more, hey let's try. And by "let's try," I mean all I did was download an app to track my month and on certain days I tried to be all seductive. And by "seductive," I mean I shaved my legs and tried to not nag about household chores too much. My doctor had asked if I wanted to try something a little more ambitious and prescriptive and I had answered, no. Let's just see what's meant to be. 

My doctor, herself a mother of three, told me that, based on my history, I was probably going to be pregnant within a couple of months. She then told me that when I did find out, I needed to call another obstetrician because she didn't take high risk patients....which is what I would be....because I was so old. 

So I skipped my too geriatric butt out of there, kind of excited and calculating possible due dates and when I'd get to wear those maternity dresses I had packed away.

And the months passed. The seasons changed. Christmas came and went. And nothing.  

Last year, a friend at work who also had two children, one boy and one girl right about the ages of my children, had asked me if we were done. We talked about it, debating the pros and cons of enlarging our families. I sort of hemmed and hawed, not ready to admit to everyone that I kind of sort of was hoping. She's now expecting twin girls this fall. I'm happy for her. I really am. I'll be honest and tell you that sometimes I think, "thank God I'm not having twins." But yeah, part of me is just a bit jealous. 

The thing is that I have a hard time articulating why even want another baby. I mean, I have all of those maternity clothes and baby girl clothes and a baby sling.

Those are great reasons to have another baby (with about a 50% success rate with the baby clothes).

I might FINALLY be able to convince my husband that we need a bigger house with a better spot for me to take outfit selfies.

Fantastic reason to have another baby.

I kind of don't like me job, but not enough to quit for no reason.

Have another baby. Problem solved.

You know that big deal I made about having a really hot bikini body by summer? I'd be like, so let off the hook if I got pregnant.

Now THAT is an excellent reason to have another baby. 

I kind of like the name Margot.

Excellent reason to have another baby (and once again, with a 50% success rate). 

There are so many reasons for being happy with what I have, most of them having to do, at least indirectly, with sleep. I mean, I can barely handle the two that I have right now. I leave them alone for a minute with a set of magic markers and they go all Braveheart on me.

And where ARE you suppose to put the third car seat? 

I hope no one reads this and thinks that I'm putting myself in a category of people who have experienced infertility issues or problems conceiving. I know I'm not. I know I'm lucky as hell for what I have. I'm just discussing what it's been like knowing that my body made a decision about something so important and it didn't want to cooperate with what I wanted, or at least thought I wanted.

I'm also coming to terms that I've now officially entered into this other stage of life where I'm no longer a young mother in her reproductive years, but an older mom who is past all of that. I mean, I realize that women get pregnant at or even after 43 and so far, everything is wanting to work like clock work with no sign of the impending ....."change." But back when I said I wanted to give it one last go, it was with the understanding that 42 was it. 43 would be the end of my trying and I am. 

So those maternity clothes are in a box in the back of my car now and I know I should just get rid of them. But I just ....can't. I don't know why. 

On the eve of my 43rd birthday, when it was clear that my 'one last shot' wasn't going to happen, I celebrated, like any non-pregnant woman can. 

I would say that I slept in, but no, I don't get to do that...even on my birthday. I still may not have a fantastic bikini body by summer and maybe we'll get a dog and we'll name her Margot. Things will be as they were meant to be. 

Wednesday, April 20, 2016

That Time I Tried Lash Extensions

Have you ever wanted to try something out for so long and one day just got the bug (or maybe the email from Groupon) and thought, what the hell. Today is the day. I'm just going to do it.

For me, recently, that was lash extensions. I was pretty much okay with the state of my eyelashes. I wore mascara everyday, but it wasn't something that was too time consuming and I had even discovered a good waterproof kind that could generally withstand the hottest and most-humid yoga class.

But I could not NOT notice all of the lash extension businesses and advertisements popping up. I started envying other women's uniform volume and perfectly coiffured lashes. Dark thick lashes do give a certain oomph to a face. I mean, have you been watching The Catch? Anybody else look at Alice Vaughn and think wow, Detective Sarah Linden looks soooo different with lashes?

So, on the eve of my 43rd birthday, I thought, what the hell. Let's try them out. I was a little nervous, but the extension specialist was a very very nice woman who made me feel completely at ease before she scotch taped my eyes. I told her I didn't want anything crazy and just the most basic and natural looking set she had.

And then, for the next two hours, I had the best afternoon nap I have had in a LONG time. A couple of times my snoring woke me up and it took me a second to remember where I was and why my lids were taped up. But then I would remember and just go back to sleep.

When I woke up, I have to admit, I kind of liked what I saw. They weren't too crazy. I wasn't like Pricilla Presley on her wedding day or anything. It felt weird, but it looked kind of good.

I didn't tell my husband what I had done. That night, he kept staring at my eyes though. I thought I had fooled him. I thought, he doesn't even know why I look so hot.

I could tell a difference.  I could definitely feel a difference. They feel weird and you have to be extremely delicate with them. That kind of annoyed me.

Over the next couple of days, a few fell out. A few got caught in my eye, which was REALLY annoying. I was afraid to take a shower and get my face caught under the stream. I was afraid to wash my face. I was afraid to touch my eye. A few more fell out. A few more got caught in my eye. By day three I was annoyed. Really? These are suppose to make my life easier?

On day three, my husband looked lovingly in my eyes and asked, what the hell is up with you lashes? He had noticed. He didn't like them.

By day five, I was completely annoyed and started using forbidden mineral oil to gently rub at them and encourage their departure.

Well, that was a big ol' waste of money. I'm going back to my trusty waterproof mascara.
To tell you the truth, I'm glad I didn't like them. Getting them filled is time consuming and expensive. Very expensive. But I'm glad I tried it and got it out of the way so that I know what I don't want to do in the future.

For one day, I did feel kind of glamorous.  But, it's just not me.

Have you had eyelash extensions? Or are you talented enough to do them yourself? What did you think of them?

Monday, April 18, 2016


And I'm still here. I've been on this little blog break for a reason which can only be described as..I don't know....trying to avoid a complete breakdown. March was a hard month. I have no one to blame but myself. I brought it on myself. So I've been taking a bit of a break. I've been resting. I've been trying to minimize time on social media. I've been spending time with my family without worrying about whether I'll have time to throw a post or two together.

I miss blogging. I miss you. I do. But I have to be honest. I've really been enjoying the excess time I've had.

I have not spent all of that time cleaning and organizing my house. I've started to think about it and I have taken a few things to goodwill and a kids' resale shop. But my house is still just as dirty and cluttered as it was a month ago. But I've started to think about it. Doesn't that count for something?

I'm inspired by this blog's call to declutter with 40 bags in 40 days.  I've started, but I'm going more at a pace of one bag a week, so I should be good by summer 2017.

I've been listening to a whole lot of Gretchen Rubin. Anne may have been the first to recommend her to me. Then Shea reviewed her book favorably. Then I heard someone else recommend it and so I used an Audible monthly credit to listen to Better Than Before.  To say that the book and its message resonated with me is an understatement and I'm now a big fan. I'm listening to her podcast daily and I've now started in on the companion journal.

If I do continue blogging (and I intend to) you're probably going to be hearing more about Gretchen, her sister and her daily teachings. My poor dear husband has to hear something about it every morning and evening. He's a total Questioner and questions the validity of the four personalities, but I still make him listen to me read a daily email I get on how we can strengthen our relationship.

So I've been away for a while. I've been decluttering my mind and thinking about decluttering my house. But I'm still here and hoping to be back.

Monday, March 21, 2016


And it's spring! I love spring. I love tulips and the promises of wearing new clothes and I love getting the kiddos new spring clothes (which I've been doing a lot of lately). I'm really ready to start wearing the spring and summer clothes and sandals which are currently buried away in a storage closet. Last week, everything I wore was old and boring not worth mentioning in a separate picture. But here you go.

My favorite outfit was, by far, the one I put together for St. Patty's day. That t-shirt is very old and from Old Navy. I bought it when I had first started dating my husband. His (now our) last name is Green and I wore it on one of our dates with a coat over it. We got to our table and I took off my coat and just waited. When he finally looked up from the menu, the change in his expression was pretty cute.

Speaking of new clothes for the kiddos, my little guy loves his Halloween costume and is always pulling it out. When I overheard the two of them discussing her need to dress up as Robin, I had to, HAD to, get this little number for her.

They're wearing these outfits all of the time now (only in the house--that's my rule) and I have glitter sprinkled all over.  I mean ALL OVER.

I did get this little dress for her and then, on a whim, decided I had to have the matching grown up version. Her version is adorable. My version was the most unflattering thing you could even try to put on me.

This past weekend was a fun one with a lot going on. On Friday, Hubs and I both took a day off from work and spent it up in Park City and had some time to do wild and crazy things like have breakfast in a restaurant and beer and wine in the afternoon.

On Saturday, we drove the kids up to the Treehouse Museum up in Ogden (about a half hour drive) which was so much fun. It was one of those moments of wondering why we hadn't been before.

And on Sunday, we took the kiddos to an Easter egg hunt, where the eggs were not very well hidden.

That afternoon, I then took them to the Gateway Discovery Center for some more play time. We were out and about and I didn't get much done other than hang out with my family. Isn't that the way it should be?

Which brings me to my last spring thought. I'm going to take a bit of a break from this blog. It started out as a way to spend some free time when I was stuck at home while the kids napped or slept. It was meant to be a fun little hobby and a way for me to make a few connections. And that it has and I've really enjoyed being part of this community and making new "friends." But I've always said I would do it until it wasn't fun and it's kind of come to that.

The kids are napping less and I'm finding myself getting irritable and angry when they don't because it interferes with my blogging. My house is a mess and there are so many projects and things to clean that I haven't because what bit of free time I have is spent here. It's starting to affect my sleep, my mood, my work and most importantly, my family. That's where I need to draw the line. 

I'm not saying quitting and I'm not shutting it down. I'm just taking a break. I don't know exactly how long, but it may be a while. I need to catch my breath, catch up with a lot of housework and savor every moment with this cute little family of mine while I still can. I hope to be back. I just need it to be a time when I want to be back. 

I'll see you soon.

Wednesday, March 16, 2016

Oh, Just Go To The Party

A few weeks ago, I was invited to a birthday party for a friend I hadn't seen in a while. It was one of those Facebook invites where you get to see everyone else who was invited and who was coming and who wasn't. I spotted only a couple of other women who I knew and they weren't confirming, but I wouldn't be deterred by that. I told Hubs to schedule our babysitter (A/K/A Grandpa) and prepare for a rare glimpse at what our social lives used to be.

The party was this past Saturday. On Friday, the Utah Utes basketball team won some game or something which meant they were playing some other game on Saturday night or something like that. (Can you tell how much I cared?). Well, that meant Grandpa wanted to watch the game at his favorite sports bar surrounded by all of his buddies and Hubs was like, do I really have to go?

My answer: Hubs, you can watch the game from our living room with the kiddos. I'm going to the par-tay.
Getting ready for solo party going with spectators
I've mentioned before that I spent a good portion of my adult life as a single lady and I moved around quite a bit for work. When I moved, I often didn't know anyone and that necessitated getting out and walking into parties and social events without knowing someone. I can't say that I was ever entirely comfortable with it, but now, after a few years, I'm definitely out of practice. I knew from the final Facebook count that I didn't know anyone else except the birthday girl and kindof sortof her husband. But, I was going.  I hadn't seen my friend in a while and I really wanted to go. I was going.

And so I went, touting a bottle of wine and a shrimp tray (because that's what I do). I walked into the living room and saw.... no one I knew and no one to greet me and everyone engrossed in conversation.

But I made my way to the kitchen where I found the birthday girl and her husband who were very nice and said hello and introduced me to a few people. But I knew I couldn't depend entirely on them and I didn't want to hover around the food table or make a run for the door too early.  

And I remembered how I used to talk myself up in these kinds of situations and what I recommend to young lawyers and law students who are faced with a networking social event.

Be More Interested Than Interesting

So that's what I did. And I met some very interesting people that night. I met the mother of Ricki Lander (who I hadn't heard of before to be honest). Her mother, who was a really pleasant and nice woman, talked a small bit about what it's like to read about your child in a gossip column and what it's like to sit in the owner's suite of a Super Bowl. 

I also met a very talented make-up artist who is absolutely stunning in person as well.  

She gave me some great tips about false eyelashes (one of these days I of these days) and I encouraged her to start blogging about her talent.  

I then noticed that everyone was wearing similar charms around their necks. When I asked someone about them, I learned that the other birthday girl (it was a double birthday party and I only knew one of them) makes them to raise money and awareness for the fight against cystic fibrosis.  

This charm and other designs by Lissa can be found here
I talked to others that night and just ended up with a pleasant feeling of a night well spent with interesting people I don't imagine that I met my next best friend that night and who knows if I'll ever see any of them again. but I do think that I was positively impacted by each person I met that night and I learned a little bit from each of them. 

If, after learning that I was on my own and going to a party where I didn't know anyone, I had let fear and shyness win out and not gone, I wouldn't have met any of these people and I would have been worse off without even knowing it.

Do you ever go to parties where you won't know anyone, or you will know just one person? Just go. You'll do yourself a favor. What's the worse that can happen? When you do, here's my tip:

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